The part one of this series took us on the importance of having a health and robust communication in friendships and relationships. This part two, which is the concluding part shares a story on the essence of open communication.
Here is a situation where a healthy and robust communicative atmosphere could have prevented the bad turnout in a relationship (friendship in this case).
Hadizah and Detoun had been friends since their 100 level days, they’ve been inseparable since then, even everyone who knew them could vouch for their ‘authentic’ love for one another. On getting into their second year, Hadizah showed interest in running for a particular post in their department which Detoun was aware of. However, unknown to her, Detoun also had the intention of running.
Though she already thought of not declaring until she felt Hadizah was drifting away and less interested in being around her as she had been cancelling visits and hanging out with “new friends” since she started working towards her ambition and not involving her.
Few weeks later Hadizah was hit by the news of a new opponent – Detoun. She felt betrayed, hurt, and angry and decided to confront her. She did and they had a hot argument which led to a fight and then resentment and rivalry as Detoun had refused to step down after Hadizah had told her to.
Detoun who had felt disregarded enough by her actions and negligence bluntly vowed never to back down and run anyway. Moreover, all these led to their whole friendship come crashing down and them becoming “strangers” to each other. Even after Hadizah eventually won the election, things never got back to how it used to be as their friendship was over.
It’s quite evident here that the situation could have been cleared even before things went completely bad if there had been a healthy communication beforehand. If Detoun had made a step to actually talk to Hadizah about how she was feeling and Hadizah had been considerate enough to involve Detoun in her dealings and explained why she had not been available like she used to, it’s quite likely that things wouldn’t have gotten that bad.
Detoun might have probably understood that Hadizah wasn’t intentionally neglecting her and she probably wouldn’t have declared to run anyway (since she had did so because she felt Hadizah had lost interest in their friendship). In all, they would have been able to work things out after properly communicating and understanding each other’s feelings.
All the long talks end and conclude at one thing – COMMUNICATION is KEY!
LOLU Aladeselu is currently a law undergraduate who’s not only passionate about telling stories to/on behalf of people and writing eye opening articles but also keen on volunteering with different organizations both local international and even gone as far as holding an executive position in one of the on-campus organizations she volunteers with. She’s also very particular about traveling , seeing and learning new things.